#nowplaying : shadow - BEAST
have you ever wonder why you're born in the life you doesn't like it? you always ask for perfect. and something that you want. but it ended up not.for example, you wish for a happy family. but it ended up breaking up into pieces. and then you'll feel really hurtful. the most worst nightmare is when you're having a bad dream. and there's no one there for you to hug you, telling you its' alright.no. there's no one.
people lie. behind those " i will be there for you. " there's lie. they always lie. they won't be there for you. just that they have to pretend to be there. and when you ask for their shoulder, they'll be like smiling saying something like " what's wrong? " but the truth is , they'll be irritated. calling you crybaby that you'll never know.
i thought that all people is kind, till i found out the truth. everything is just a lie. it seems like they are with you, but you won't know that in the next seconds, they will backstab you. and when it really happens. you've realized that it's too late.
really wondering why people trust people. by just 'saying out from your mouth' of course 10% of the people in the world can be trust. but, where can you find them? in next life? who knows. i sometimes get tired of those lies my friend told me. example; money. all my friends talk about money. when i'm broke. they pretend not to know me. is this what friends really call?
i don't really know anymore. i don't . you might call me low self esteem. but trust me. if you actually use your heart to be friend with people., you'll ended up hurting more. no people in this world can be trusted. even your closest friend can just betray you in any seconds. you gotta buck up and pretend nothing happen when things are worst.
let's just say, i am scare of losing friends. but i don't want to get betray, nor get used. i don't want to. i know. i am stupid when it comes to friend. but really. i just want a friendship. a someone who'll be there for me. not someone that will leave me.
this might be my longest post i guess. by typing haha. okay. i'm done have fun okay? i hope i am fine soon. :-)
